Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
if i died would you start the facebook group?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
