May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
