I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
