This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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