Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Can't talk, ducks in the car
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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