Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
she smelled like a LAN party
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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