he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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