Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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