Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
