I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
