there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
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