Yo dont text me then not text me
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
