The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I'm getting married
To pizza
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Randomize
