11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
