Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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