I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Define "chronic" masturbator.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
