your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Acid is not a monday night drug
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
