We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
