I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
