Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
