You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I have fence marks all over my body
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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