genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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