shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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