Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry flowerbuddy hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(512): View more from Texas

remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning

Fav 15 1593 3930
share tweet
(203): View more from Connecticut

Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?

Fav 16 4133 2158
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(732): View more from New Jersey

the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.

Fav 18 2032 4328
share tweet
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?

Fav 8 2074 4220
share tweet
(951): View more from California

I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.

Fav 5 1249 2981
share tweet
(540): View more from Virginia

I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.

Fav 8 2851 1406
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.

Fav 8 2053 746
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(905): View more from Ontario

It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.

Fav 1 491 325
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(330): View more from Ohio

so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.

Fav 1 12 54
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT