Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
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