I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
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