...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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