I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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