After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
