Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
