nut hugger
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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