dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Randomize