You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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