Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
