do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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