susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize