Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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