She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
