Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
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