Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
