Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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