is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I'm passing your future prison.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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