you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I am available for nakedness
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
