Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize