singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize