woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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