Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
