It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
