Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
