WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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