She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
